A drugged-up woman on the island of Guam -who allegedly is in a relationship with a retired Marine- went on an aggressive tirade against a local neighbor.

In what might be a great educational video on why drugs are bad, the scantily-clad fake blonde -who is referred to as “Nellie”- spoke angrily in an already difficult-to-understand accent before crossing her eyes and speaking in tongues.

Nellie made several threats to her neighbor as she closed the distance and rattled a chain-link fence, claiming the (calm and patient) individual would be “spartan kicked by a mermaid.”

Eventually, the neighbor grows tired of such nonsense and stops filming altogether, leaving Nellie to deal with invisible dragons, non-existent children and her Marine veteran partner, which may or may not be a real person.

Guam has a huge US military presence, and northern Guam will soon be home to around 4,000 Marines, pending the completion of Marine Corps Base Guam in a few years.

Hopefully, Nellie will have her life together by then. Or not.

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